Data protection a nightmare for Santa Claus

HE sees you when you’re sleeping. He knows when you’re awake… but only if he complies with national and international guidelines on General Data Protection Regulations.
Boys and girls all over the world are being warned their presents might not be there on Christmas morning – and digital privacy law is to blame.
A spokesman for Father Christmas issued a statement from the North Pole saying: “He’s making a list. And checking it twice. But he’s had to struggle through a blizzard of legal requirements.”
Another of the elves told the Daily Goggle exclusively: “It has been getting harder for Santa to find out who’s been naughty and who’s been nice. If he can’t tell, then how can he know who deserves presents?”
Logistically, Santa is still a world leader. Internet technology and social media have had a disruptive effect from an organisational and technical viewpoint but there are signs that Santa and his helpers have begun to use it to their advantage.
The elf said: “In the analytics era with master data management, he knows if you’ve been good or bad. So be good for goodness’ sake.”
He added: “You better watch out.” The elf also advised against crying or pouting and revealed: “I’m telling you why – Santa Claus has attended a webinar on Collaboration and Innovation in the Creation of a Sustained, Governed Data Asset.”
Santa spared a few moments from his busy schedule and agreed to a brief interview with the Daily Goggle.
Looking at piles of presents around his grotto he sighed and said: “What with the new requirements it’ll be a miracle if all this lot gets delivered by daybreak on December 25.”