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Donald Trump and Theresa May

Donald Trump blasts Nasser Hussain as worst England cricket captain

DONALD Trump has added to the controversy over his official visit to Britain by lambasting former England cricket captain Nasser Hussain. In a series of tweets...
Hunter and Michael Gove

Earners below £15,500 are sentient, say Conservatives

BRITAIN'S Conservative Party has confirmed its belief that people who earn under £15,500 per year are sentient. The Tories have been accused of saying that...
Mugabe, Johnson and Zimbabwe flag

Zimbabwe Britons flee homes after Boris Johnson advises them to stay in

THE 20,000-plus British citizens living in crisis-hit Zimbabwe burst out of their front doors in response to Boris Johnson advising them it was safer...
Bounty on Donald Trump's head

Bounty on Donald Trump’s head

The White House was engulfed in a fresh crisis last night after a picture emerged of a Bounty bar on Donald Trump’s head. The President...
Prison and Labour's John McDonnell

Criminals vow to leave Britain if John McDonnell is made Home Secretary

A LEAKED top-level Labour plan to switch John McDonnell from shadow chancellor to shadow home secretary has kick-started an exodus of criminals from Britain. The...
New Tory manifesto and PM at conference

New Tory manifesto showcases policy to build a better Britain for EVERTON

THE relaunched Conservative Party manifesto is headed by a pledge to build “a better Britain for EVERTON”. It is a surprise move that is widely...
Ice cream with flake

White House attacks outbreak of flake news

The White House yesterday responded to a report that a man had inserted a chocolate bar into an ice cream cornet - by dismissing...
Donald Trump condemns gender pay inequality

Donald Trump cancels visit to Britain in protest at gender pay gap

US President Donald Trump has called off a visit to the UK – in disgust at the culture of unequal pay at the BBC. He...

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